Welcome To The Jungle & The Temple : Koh Phangan

* lyrical disclaimer *

Like a tool,

I dropped my iPad in the pool,

A digital Persephone,

I am blogging from my phone!!

[Embarassing story to be left for the Koh Tao post]

I am now in Koh Tao and it is time to be looking back at Koh Phangan !

First of all, the hotel I was staying at : The Salad Buri Resort & Spa. Well… you see the golf cart in the picture?

 

 

… I could NOT go back to my room or to the restaurant without being carted off like a 102 years old Tropical Pope onto the goddamn golf cart!

The rooms and villas are located on 90 degrees like hills and I literally closed my eyes every time I had to go on the cart, as you face the way down when you go up, and your entire body is asking to roll off the cart and down the hill … ROCK & ROLL!!

The hotel compound is beautiful but to be honest it didn’t have the charm or the vibes Koh Lanta had.

 

 

As I didn’t want to feel trapped (Okay i exaggerate, there is a lovely beach opposite), I booked a day trip which included a visit to a crocodile farm, a waterfall, an elephant and a temple. Note to tour operator : I would do the temple first, to allow tourists to pray for the safety of their booty pre-crocodile visit. You’re welcome.

My tour guide was sweet (bless him) and explained a lot of things which I’ll try to retranscribe.

The Crocodile Farm…

Tour guide : “you want to go in and I take pictures? Crocodile lazy animal

Me, turning my head to see this beast:

 

 

Then these beasts:

 

 

Me, pretending to be a professional photographer and pointing at my camera: “it’s ok! I have a Zoom lens!

HELL TO THE NO!

I don’t care how lazy this animal is (apparently they eat once every 7 days, and lay in the sun to digest the other days) mama was going to zoom the fuck outta the crocodile whilst creating enough distance to be able to make it to Bangkok.

The only reptile I like is in Super Mario Bros, so this was a big deal.(FYI Yoshi)

The good thing is that after the Lacoste mammals I got to see cute little Thai bunnies!

 

 

I also got to see an elephant but it made me a bit sad as the Elephant looked depressed. Hopefully he was just sleepy:

 

The Jungle & The Waterfall

After this animalistic excursion, we drove to Koh Phangan’s National Park, where the Phaeng waterfall is.

THIS is what you have trek on to get to the waterfall :


 

The waterfall…

 

There was hardly any water that day other than the one rolling down my forehead !!!

Never mind we carried on walking upwards in the jungle. Haven’t sweat that much since Metallica 2006.

 

 

I sat down on a rock and splashed about for a bit to refresh. Going uphill with a big ass and a big ass camera under 30 degrees is not to be underestimated!

 

After this epic trek (for my lazy city girl standards), it was time to head to the temple.

The Temple (Wat Pa Saeng Dham)

My favourite bit and extremely interesting!

 

First off, let’s start with something that made me chuckle but also think “why did they need to put this up??!”

 

 

This area was amazing because it actually houses 4 temples : one for the Thais, one for the Burmese, one for the Indians and one for the Chinese. All in one place .

 

The Thai Temple :

My guide mentioned that every Thai goes for 3 months on a “Buddhist Course” at some point in their life, and they are given life advice by monks. “They see you swimmin’, they be hatin’. Don’t be a puppet and they’ll be shooketh!”

[If only we had that in the UK instead of stupid corporate courses about being a sociable colleague!]

Also, monks get given baskets full of convenience goods by the villagers, and in return they provide their spiritual services.

Head, shoulders, knees and cobras.

Buddhists do not worship the Buddha per se, but the state of enlightenment achieved through meditation.

But still, some worship happens … these are bones taken from the cremations of monks … eeek :

Now onto the Indian area :

The Chinese area:

The Burmese area:

The crazy area:

Well that is it for this post on some of Koh Phangnan’s gems.

I need to go ask for spiritual advice on how not to be a dumbass with an iPad so that’s what I’m gonna do for now!

Until then,

Xxx

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